Wow- Friday night here in LA I went to the Echoplex to see HWM play NO DIVISION in full and it was fucking powerful and so stupidly nostalgic. I think at 37 I'm having a midlife crisis and I just don't know how to lead a life anymore. The other day I ate an edible and wandered LA on foot listening to some Boards of Canada and saw young people spilling onto the streets from what was clearly a party going on in someone's apartment and I had crazy flashbacks back to the loft scene in Brooklyn and seeing house/loft shows and strangers spilling everywhere in dimly lit hallways, cigarette and weed smoke wafting all over the air, tubs and pitchers full of cheap beer and just the feeling anything is possible and randomly meeting people and having under the influence conversations and feeling young and amazing. And it just stung that it feels like all that is in the past. That life is buried but still exists for others in a different setting and wow. It's hard aging. And then going to the HWM show and screaming along and wondering what the latest punk bands that are doing it for the youth today. Going back to a time where it seemed like we all wanted to pick the most emotional choiciest lyrics our AIM info msg for people to read and grasp onto for just a lifeline to make it through a cold night. I forgot what it was like to feel that way. It was nice. And it was also unsettling at the same time.
It seems like life is a revolving circle and disconnected alienation and how could I forget that this feeling was once the norm and now only shoots into me sometimes while attending a HWM show or walking around the city high on weed. It's crazy. Otherwise I'm just an aging weirdo trying to find a reason to smile every single day. Not much different than when a punk lyric was what I needed. Sorry this is rambling but just felt like posting.
It seems like life is a revolving circle and disconnected alienation and how could I forget that this feeling was once the norm and now only shoots into me sometimes while attending a HWM show or walking around the city high on weed. It's crazy. Otherwise I'm just an aging weirdo trying to find a reason to smile every single day. Not much different than when a punk lyric was what I needed. Sorry this is rambling but just felt like posting.