28/11/20 - 23:31 PM


Author Topic: i know in my heart already but is this crazy and absurdly codependent of me..  (Read 540 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

pronetoaccidents

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 832
  • punx points +6/-0
  • i have need of angels enough hell has swallowed me
    • View Profile
    • im quite scared (crime/noir/terror/suspense/doom n' gloom
i dunno. this probably isn't thread material but I suppose I can make it an all around relationship (what's healthy, what's not, codependency, etc) type thread.

So i just started talking to this girl on tinder a few weeks ago. and we started hanging out for a week, even though it feels like months because we've been living together for that whole time. and i had to be outta my place by april 1st and she's like "Oh it's fine! just move in with me!" and it's like a whirlwind, that honeymoon phase where it's nothing but sex all day and acting stupid and annoying and touchy around friends.

I'm still not over my ex. I don't believe I ever will be. I don't know if Dead Moon was right when they crooned "love comes once and then it goes" but i just know it feels nice to be liked and to like someone. i feel giddy and like a little kid and get butterflies in my belly. Because when i'm with them, i'm with them. I think cheating is the most fucked up thing you can do, it just wastes peoples time. Especially when you're not married and there's no kids involved, and if you are feeling the desire to be with someone else then obviously there's a problem.

I know it probably sounds like i'm taking advantage (I was a day away from being homeless again) but i genuinely like her and she likes me. we're probably setting ourselves up to crash and burn because we're both obviously needy and codependent and big babies and sex addicts and everything addicts (food for her. you already know my deal. i don't need to rehash) but i believe everything happens for a reason. I've been drawing very similiar tarot threads saying something to the extent of reaching some new plateau in life and there's going to be new beginnings and adventures and i equated it to just being single before I met her but.. god, i dunno.

why can't i just be a healthy, ordinary human being. is that a a real thing? are there actually healthy people that don't make spontaneous decisions? I have no job, she works at walmart, i had some movie saved up which i'm pissing through in the most absurd and decadent ways now that i found out i don't have to pay rent...
« Last Edit: March 24, 2016, 12:48:31 PM by pronetoaccidents »
Though lovers be lost love shall not.

No comments for this topic.